I'm a preacher, and I use words for a living. I can articulate beautiful theology, deliver stirring sermons, pray eloquently. But my marriage was cold. My kids were distant. I was great at talking about love while being absent from the people who needed my presence.
John cuts right through it: 'Let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.' All my theological brilliance means nothing if I'm not actually showing up for people with my time, my attention, my sacrifice.
I started asking my family what they needed from me - not what they needed to hear from me, but what they needed me to DO. My daughter asked me to help her with her studies without checking my phone. My son asked me to attend his soccer games. My wife asked me to be present instead of mentally preparing my next sermon.
I rearranged my whole schedule. I told the church: my preaching will be different because I'm actually going to be present in my family first. Some people were upset. I didn't care. John was right - love is a verb. It costs you something. And I'd been trying to get credit for the thoughts without paying the price.
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